The Realist

An optimist a pessimist and a realist are sitting in a room.

They notice a glass placed on a table in the center of the room.

The room is not very large, but spacious enough so that the three do not invade each others space.

The optimist says "the glass is half full".

The pessimist says "the glass is half empty". We know that already, don`t we?!

The realist says "... not so fast."

First she asks if we are talking about the same glass. We give her a "duh" look but she is least bothered. She demands to know. Once we are thro with that, she demands to know the necessity for an answer? Ah ha! So the realist is not so smart after all.

We spend some time explaining to her the importance of not only knowing the right answer but also how the answer determines our outlook towards life.

She seems convinced and her next question is; what happens to the glass after we have her opinion on the glass.

Now that is something that we never thought of, did we? What happens to our hero after he rides off into the sunset, having conquered his arch enemy?

Now that is a question which, in the coming years, would replace the "glass with the water" question. I my opinion this one would give us, the seekers of truth, better insights into about ourselves.

Back to the realist. We admit that we have no idea about the fate of the glass once she has answered "the" question.

She does not press us for an answer: maybe she knows it or perhaps she does not care.

Upon hearing her answer to the seemingly simple question, the pessimist and the optimist quietly get up and leave the room. They know that they have just been, shall we say, "Terminated". Well "terminated" is a very strong term so why not just say "replaced". Or better still "your services are no longer required, thank you".

So what did the realist say?

"The glass is leaking."

This train is bound for Nakano (or Imagination Engines)

A soft voice announces the destination of the train I take to work. The announcements are in Japanese first and then in English. The guard then announces the same in Japanese only.

The recording is unlike most of the recorded messages I have heard in India, where common phrases are recorded once and then mixed and matched to produce the complete sentence. Here in Japan, the recorded message is fluent and unbroken, which I guess is because its recorded completely in one go.

One such morning, I asked my friend, how do you think she is? "Who?".

I say the girl who recorded the message on train routes. He dismisses the question with, "aare whats there? She must be very fair and cute. She`s Japanese after all! Thats it! You dont have any imagination, do you?!"

Hmm.. this guy has some imagination. He could probably shoot the side of a barn with a shotgun and call himself a sharpshooter!

Listed below(oh! so formal) are some of the questions that occurred to me -

How was the girl selected to record the message?

Was there an audition?

What was the girl thinking when she was recording the train routes?

Was this something she wanted to do in the first place?

Was this what she wanted to do as a little girl?

Was does she feel when she`s in one of the trains and hears the sound of her own voice?

What would her children have to say about their mother?

Did she want to be a singer but ended up recording this?

Or is she a famous singer already and this was a kind of a favor she did to the Railway Department?

Is her boyfriend the biggest fan of her voice?

Did he propose to her because he fell in love with her voice?

Is this girl an employee of the Railways?

What do her co-workers think of her?

What would she feel when her recording was replaced with a different, perhaps a more youthful, voice?

The list is in no way complete.

And to get answers I guess I will have to start revving my engines.